meladoodle:

*throws coins at strippers really hard*

e102gamma:

I wanna do dirty stuff with u like farming

marginalising:

NOT EVERYTHING IS ABOUT A GOD DAMN RELATIONSHIP AND LOSING WEIGHT AND BEING BEAUTIFUL FOR GODS SAKE GO OUTSIDE AND ROB A STORE AND FEEL ALIVE AS YOU RUN AWAY FROM SECURITY

absolutest:

I hate when you find someone soooooo attractive, but when they open their mouth, you lose interest.

thetowndrugdealer:

I’m perfect

rumour:

i feel like a crazy justin bieber fan will try and get arrested just to spend time in jail wit him

jacobshutup:

i didnt know lana del rey wrote the national anthem

internetmessiah:

i love conspiracy theories bc at first you think they’re utter bullshit but then you start reading these crackpot articles and suddenly you’re convinced Obama is actually a reptilian overlord and the moon landing was faked

penis-hilton:

fuck yo obstacles

penis-hilton:

fuck yo obstacles

moseby:

im pretty sure owning a frozen yogurt machine would solve 100% of my problems

smallgay:

my rapper name would be 2 stressd

'are you flirting with me or are you like this to everyone' a classic novel by me